Julia Prays to Forget Evan

I suppose I should want to talk about the President’s bold new plan for Iraq, but it’s all too depressing, isn’t it? So I figured it’s time for another godstory. The character of God owes a lot to a certain kind of sentimental movie version of the miraculous done so well in the 40’s by guys like Frank Capra. My adolescent religion was watching those things on tv every afternoon. Those stories owe a debt to Dickens, whose A Christmas Carol is a touchstone of sentimental magic. So here’s my Capraesque-Dickensish godstory:

Julia Prays to Forget Evan

Julia loads the dishwasher, wipes all the counters and splashboards clean and everything on them, scours the stovetop and the sink, vacuums and mops the floor, and watches it dry. She kneels to get a stubborn spot in front of the stove when, all of a sudden, she feels the overwhelming need to pray. It’s that or sob again. She hates that.

The tile floor under her knees is hard and cold. She’s eye-level with the digital clock on the stove, which hasn’t been reset since the thunderstorm three nights before. It blinks hypnotically: 12:00 12:00 12:00 12:00 12:00 12:00 . . . Continue reading →

An Almost Perfect Day

We’ve been having perfect weather here—dry and sunny in the 70’s—so Sarah and I took advantage of it by riding over the river to Southside on our bikes.  We locked them near the bridge, then hiked along the river and up through Forest Hill Park to a new Mexican restaurant on Forest Hill, then to a used book store close by.  Then we hiked back to our bikes.  The river was running high, and the views were spectacular with all the leaves off the trees.  It was perfect until we returned to our bikes to find that someone had snapped off the valve stems on our front tires.  We were 3 miles from home, we’d already walked 4.  We hoofed it home, returned with the car, got new tubes for the bikes.  It’s sad someone would do something like that just for the sheer assholery of it, but we didn’t let it spoil our good time.  After dinner we went to see “Deja Vu” at the Byrd, and it was a good Byrd movie ($1.99 a ticket in a gorgeous vintage movie palace is tough to complain about).  The plot is loaded with holes, but it’s a good ride, and we both like Denzel Washington in just about anything.

Kafka on the Shore

I finished reading Haruki Murakami‘s beautiful novel Kafka on the Shore a couple of days ago and still haven’t recovered from the experience. It was the first Murakami I’ve read—I don’t know how he escaped my notice before—but I intend to read more. I don’t think I’ve ever so willingly or completely surrended my disbelief to a novel before. I was quite thoroughly seduced—but not abandoned— for the book has stayed with me. One of the qualities I enjoy and admire is his refusal to let the fiction collapse into Meaning, the English Class obsession. He says in an interview “When you read a good story, you just keep reading. When I write a good story, I just keep writing.” I could feel that joyous sense as I read—that we were both having a good time. I read it because it was awarded the World Fantasy Award for 2005—which it richly deserves.

The Real Florida

We’re back from south Florida where we had a wonderful time with hosts Antigone Barton and Ken Matthews and their two cats Nat and Blondine, seen here gazing into another dimension:

We got out and saw the local architecture:

Went to the beach:

Blondine was of two minds about our visit:


We also saw more Hummers than I ever hope to see again. We found solace luxuriating in Deux Flamants, Antigone and Ken’s former home, a vintage land yacht:

All in all, a splendid way to see in the New Year.

Merry Christmas

We’re headed for Florida tomorrow with internet access unknown, so Happy New Year too in case I don’t make it back before then. Just when I thought it was safe to be a Virginian, Virgil Goode has to open his mouth. I love the name though, wish I could use it in a story. He has raised the all-important issue of what object one swears on. I mean, if he had to swear in, and he was locked in the one motel room the Gideons had missed, and there was no Bible, would a VHS of The Ten Commandments trump a copy of Paradise Lost? It’s a tough call, but I’m sure Virgil will give it some thought. Peace on Earth, good will toward all living creatures, even Virge. (Love that name!)

Slaughter of the Innocents

While watching some inspiring footage of Doorbuster Specials the other evening— eager shoppers knocked to the ground and trampled—I was wondering what was going to become of the Christmas story itself.  How is it going to compete with the gripping drama of the retail economy?  I mean, what would get it the kind of attention Mel Gibson brought to Easter?  A little baby, animals, loving mother.  Where’s the action, violence, torture, blood?  But there’s one part of the story, known only to Matthew apparently, that has great potential.  It seems that the Magi asked Herod where the King of the Jews was about to be born, which kind of freaked the collaborating sellout, and he had all the little kids murdered.  Not to worry, however, for baby Jesus had split to Egypt.  Must’ve been hard to leave behind all those kids who were supposed to be you, but nobody said it was easy to be Jesus.  The old masters knew the story of course:

Time names you

Imagine my surprise to learn that Time Magazine, that stalwart companion in doctor’s offices and checkout lines has named me Person of the Year. They’ve named Alice too. They’ve named anyone, apparently, who’ll see the cover of their magazine or go to their website. Are they stealing Stephen Colbert’s material? I tell you, friends, it’s getting harder and harder to write satire.

Alice upon learning she’s been named Person of the Year:

Sarah, too, is right proud: